How often do we look at our lives and wish for something different? It’s—unfortunately—rare to find a person completely satisfied with every aspect of their life.
The world constantly bombards us with messages about doing more, buying more, being more, achieving more, more, more. It’s endless.
When someone gets a job, they’re immediately told to start thinking of the next one. When someone starts a relationship, there are almost always those who warn that person not to settle. When someone has their first child, people are already asking about baby number two.
Not that it’s bad to have goals and be ambitious—I’m the first person to tell you no plan is a plan to fail—but there must be a happy medium.
The thing that all these messages have in common is that they claim this “next thing” will make you happy, or happier, or happiest.
And yet, when people buy the next best thing, break up with their partner in hopes of finding this mysterious “better option”, and force themselves into roles they don’t actually want, happiness is far from their hearts.
Because it turns out that next best thing or person or job was never the reason they would be happy. It never will be.
Why?
Because happiness is a feeling, and contentment is a choice.
Contentment comes from inside us, like a spring; happiness is a temporary state, like a puddle. Quick to form, quick to dry.
When we turn inwards for our contentment and peace, we free ourselves from the constant pace of more more more, and we can just…be.
Be in the moment. Be content. Be grateful, be thankful.
Don’t get me wrong—contentment does not mean complacency, or a license to stop trying. It means no matter the outcome, you are still, and calm, and sure-footed.
In this season of thankfulness, with the holidays around every corner, there is an even harsher message screaming that you should be spending more, having more fun, loving life more, etc.
But the truth is the holidays are a hard time for many. Not all of us are going to be in the merriest of spirits.
That’s okay. We do not have to be blindingly happy 24/7 to make the most of the holidays. We can choose to be content. We can reach inside instead of searching outside of ourselves for validation or fulfillment or joy.
We have the capacity to make our own joy and nurture it daily. Not only the capacity but the privilege. You could even call it a responsibility to ourselves to provide a baseline of contentment to face all of life’s ups and downs, ins and outs.
To know that we’re in control of how we choose to think and feel about our lives—not the world.
Thank you for reading, and happy belated Thanksgiving!